The Residents' News Machine is an official news blog dedicated to the activities of The Residents, which has been active at the group's official website since January 13th 2017.
This page collects posts made to this blog in January 2018, as archived on archive.org.
Blog entries[]
HEY FELLOW RESIDENTS[]

Thursday, January 4 2018, 5:18pm
Attention everyone who submitted a song to the I AM A RESIDENT! project: WE NEED YOUR UNCOMPRESSED AUDIO FILES!
Webmaster goatie has been sending email the last two weeks with instructions on where to send them, and many have complied (thank you!) but there are still some stragglers. Maybe the email is getting caught up in spam filters, so hopefully you can all see this, or can pass it along if you know one of these people.
If you have a song that appears in the song gallery and haven't sent an uncompressed version yet, please email residents.web@gmail.com for further instructions on how to do so.
Special bonus incentive: some of the missing files are for songs that are among the top voted, but we might have to remove them from consideration if we can't get high quality versions.
The Residents pREServed[]

Wednesday, January 10 2018, 10:05am
Fresh for 2018 - feast your eyeballs on these fancy 3D visuals of the forthcoming 'Meet The Residents' and 'The Third Reich 'N Roll' pREServed reissues! Both look and sound stunning, and you too can be the proud owner of your own copies! Just follow the links and all your #buyordie dreams will come true.
MEET THE RESIDENTS: http://smarturl.it/MTRpREServed
2 disc special edition of the classic debut album in both mono & stereo mixes plus over 20 previously unreleased tracks!
THIRD REICH ROCK N ROLL: http://smarturl.it/TRNRpREServed
The classic 1976 album remastered from the original tapes plus 11 unreleased recordings!
Up next, 'Fingerprince' and 'Duck Stab/Buster & Glen' - more on those next week!
Buy or Die![]

Friday, January 12 2018, 7:23pm
Is one of your New Year's resolutions "buy more Residents stuff?" If so, you may be interested in the new shopping experience at http://www.residents.com/merch/.
It's a handy little way to buy merchandise directly from MVD, and we hope you like it. For those of you who live far away and MVD is not convenient, or you want special items or digital downloads available elsewhere, we'll still maintain the old merchandise resource page here: http://www.residents.com/merch/other.php
I AM A RESIDENT! Finalists and Winners![]

Friday, January 19 2018, 7:09pm
Well it's finally happened. We're now ready to announce who's going to be on the single. After processing, like, a million votes (or three thousand, whichever comes first) and tallying the individual songs and doing some weirdo data analytical black magic, we had some clear winners. But then it still took a while (I'll explain later).
Firstly, The Residents themselves were truly impressed and overwhelmed by the quality of the submitted songs. Everybody should get a round of applause. Even the voters, because choosing favorites from the entries was really hard.

Here are the runner-ups from the main ballot. You win bragging rights:
- Theme For An American TV Show by Palo Alto
- Moisture by OK Glass
- Smelly Tongues by The Zverstvo
- Boo Who? by Cult With No Name
- Boo Who? by Lucas Marti
(Note from webmaster goatie: Secretly, "Moisture" by OK Glass is my favorite, so I'm glad to see it get recognized, even if it didn't win. Also: whoa, people really seem to like "Boo Who?" a lot, in any form. Weird.)
And now the runner-ups from the write-in part of the ballot:
- Picnic Boy by Dr. Fritz Rotwang
- BooWho? (@fivethingspercycle) by Uni
(GoatNote: "Boo Who?" again. I swear, next time we'll just ask people to submit their cover of that one song and decide once and for all which is best.)
All of the runner-ups should stand tall and proud, confident in the knowledge that they are loved, truly loved, by the public at large.

And now the moment you've been waiting for... your I AM A RESIDENT! winners:
- Demons Dance Alone by A Vast Fusion of Nice People
- Youtube Plays The Beatles Play Beyond The Valley of A Day In The Life by Pure Liquid Light
(GoatNote: A Vast Fusion of Nice People was previously known as The Vast Collective. And part of the delay in this announcement was deciding if the "Youtube Plays..." track would cause some legal trouble. Several law school dropouts were consulted, and in the end it was determined that it falls under artistic license and also shhhhh don't tell anyone.)
Congratulations to the winners, and to everyone who participated (many of whom will still appear on the final album - they're just not going to be singled out in this cheesy awards show manner).
Meet The Residents: Behind the Scenes[]

Saturday, January 27 2018, 12:14pm
Homer Flynn, Captain Doc of the Cryptic Corporation, reveals a behind the scenes story in the making of The Residents first album, Meet The Residents.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bM4Qb89XoVY
The album has just been re-released as an extended 2CD set as part of the Residents pREServed reissue campaign.
Order it here or from anywhere that's good enough to stock Residents merchandise.
Behind the Scenes of The Third Reich 'n' Roll[]

Tuesday, January 30 2018, 9:44am
Captain Doc, Homer Flynn of the Cryptic Corporation, uncovers another little known Residents' collaborator. This episode talks about the curious 5th Resident and his involvement in the group's Third Reich 'n' Roll album.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHnXKQEoFB0
The album has just been re-released as an extended 2CD set as part of the Residents pREServed reissue campaign.
Order it here or from anywhere that's good enough to stock Residents merchandise.
See also[]
External links and references[]
- The Residents' News Machine, archived January 26th 2018 by archive.org
- The Residents' News Machine, archived February 22nd 2018 by archive.org
- The Residents' News Machine, archived February 28th 2018 by archive.org
![]() |
The Residents' News Machine (2017-present) 2017 |